I've been a recovering people-pleaser and control freak since 2021.
Yet after all this time, I find myself battling old fears and behaviors in new ways.
Someone once told me, "Chañel, you cannot relate to me. You are further ahead."
To which I responded, "If life was a game, you'd be at level 6 and I'd be at level 11. And yet each time I start a new level, I start at 0."
The last few days have be a powerful reminder of that truth.
I battled an intense sense of "I'm failing"...
- I'm a bad wife.
- I'm a bad friend.
- I'm a bad business owner.
- I'm a bad Pink Flamingo who is struggling to live by the "flow" and "stewardship" standards I talk about.
In those moments, I overlooked a few truths...
- I entered a new season of life and was dealing with the overwhelm of adjusting.
- I have not yet adjusted to the new season in a way that worked for this season and felt bad about it all.
- The same approach I used to keep on top of things in the old season was not enough to get things done in the new season.
Truth be told, the only thing I was failing at was trying to keep doing things the old way.
My whole life had evolved even if my values had not.
I did not need to "try harder" or "work harder"
I needed an updated approach.
I needed to get effective not more productive.
So I took a step back. Admitted some hard truths to myself (like the fact that I was working hard to maintain the old approach so I didn't disappoint people)
Then I started making shifts from all angles so I could be better positioned to a joyful life that honors God, myself and my neighbor.
So I can be my joyful peaceful self living a disciplined life of flow and stewarding my people, vision and resources well without burning out.
Let this be a
reminder for you.
You are doing the best you can.
New seasons often require adjusting of old ways.
There are things that worked before that won't work now.
Adjust accordingly and give yourself some grace.
My Pink Flamingo friend, you are doing way better than you think.
All you need is a shift in your approach.
-Chañel
P.S. Get real with yourself. Are you more focused
on "trying harder" or "being effective"?
P.S.S. If your focus is on "being effective", take this step this week. Read "Chapter 9: The Me God
Sees" of "In Search of the Pink Flamingo". If you'd like to read and/or discuss together, reply "I'm in" to this email. If I get 10 responses, I'll host a virtual co-hangout session on Wednesday, February 26 at 7pm EST.
